Feels like God is just breaking me to reveal my need of Him more and more

My thought process through this year was just trying finding the solution to my problem! I've had endless nights of just researching online each symptoms that have been recurring. From diets, to safe exercise, to natural medicines, natural dentists, homeopathic doctors, even support groups.

I've even talked to many people in my church who have auto-immune diseases. And it has helped a lot! But I still felt this empty space in me and needed answers. Should I continue to find out what I can do to cure my disease? Should I stay in the online support groups that deal with AS even though it is overwhelmingly depressing to read? Should I cut out all the foods in my diet to eliminate inflammation? Should I try the medication of injection that my doctor recommends?

My conclusion was this: I need to pray!

Philippians 4:4-7 says,

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. ⁵ Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; ⁶ do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Soon after thanking the Lord for my disease and lifting up my burden to the Lord I decided to call a brother in Christ who is also a pastor of a church.  He too has an Auto-immune disease and I remember his dear wife (my old discipler) sharing with me how God had him at a trial that was close to death because of his disease.  I knew I could call them for spiritual advice and knowledge in medications.  So after describing what I have and the anxious thoughts I have towards it. He openly shared what he has tried medical wise and what didn't work. Then he commented that God has shown him that he was going to take it as a "thorn in the flesh". According to Paul who was a follower of Christ said this,

2 Corinthians 12:7

 

⁷ So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations,^[a] a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited.

Amazing! This verse spoke volumes to me! God knew what I needed to hear and all along it was from His Word. I was so thankful that this pastor pointed me to a saint who too went under a long term affliction while serving God.  Because honestly, when I was diagnosed, fear of not serving in a ministry or helping my family disappointed me. And this verse just helped subside this fear! Thank you Jesus!