I've discovered another way besides reading Scripture to help ease my mind off the pain. I purchased an easy playing chord book of gospel songs. I worshipped my God through this and found it very comforting to sing the words great truth. The song that ministered to my heart today was called Because He Lives. And the lyrics go like this:
(Verse 1)
God sent his son
They called him Jesus
He came to love
Heal and forgive
He lived and died
To buy my pardon
An empty grave
Is there to prove
My Savior lives
(Chorus)
Because he lives
I can face tomorrow
Because he lives
All fear is gone
Because I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because he lives
(Verse 2)
How sweet to hold
A newborn baby
And feel the pride
And joy he gives
But greater still
The calm assurance
This child can face
Uncertain days
Because he lives
(Chorus)
(Verse 3)
And then one day
I'll cross the river
I'll fight life's final war with pain
And then as death
Gives way to victory
I'll see the lights
Of glory and
I'll know he lives
This inspired my husband to play it on his guitar for our bible study tonight and made it sweeter!
My husband taught out of 1 John 5:13-15 and shared with us how we can have certainty through Christ that we have eternal life if we believe. No false teacher/preacher or doubts of God should sway us to think otherwise. The world is full of uncertain things...that is why we have insurances, warranties etc. But God's Word is certain and His promises are forever. What a great reminder to know that He promised me eternal life when I first believed. And that right now I am LIVING ETERNALLY. It has already been given to me. When I die, God's glory will be shown in FULL. What am I doing to do with that encouragement in mind?
GLORIFY GOD in all CIRCUMSTANCES. I want to spend my life ALL OUT for the King! And that means, dying to myself, serving whole heartedly, loving one another, grabbing every opportunity to share God's goodness, give grace, and deepen my relationship with my Heavenly Father.
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Monday, June 3, 2013
Feels like God is just breaking me to reveal my need of Him more and more
My thought process through this year was just trying finding the solution to my problem! I've had endless nights of just researching online each symptoms that have been recurring. From diets, to safe exercise, to natural medicines, natural dentists, homeopathic doctors, even support groups.
I've even talked to many people in my church who have auto-immune diseases. And it has helped a lot! But I still felt this empty space in me and needed answers. Should I continue to find out what I can do to cure my disease? Should I stay in the online support groups that deal with AS even though it is overwhelmingly depressing to read? Should I cut out all the foods in my diet to eliminate inflammation? Should I try the medication of injection that my doctor recommends?
My conclusion was this: I need to pray!
Philippians 4:4-7 says,
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Soon after thanking the Lord for my disease and lifting up my burden to the Lord I decided to call a brother in Christ who is also a pastor of a church. He too has an Auto-immune disease and I remember his dear wife (my old discipler) sharing with me how God had him at a trial that was close to death because of his disease. I knew I could call them for spiritual advice and knowledge in medications. So after describing what I have and the anxious thoughts I have towards it. He openly shared what he has tried medical wise and what didn't work. Then he commented that God has shown him that he was going to take it as a "thorn in the flesh". According to Paul who was a follower of Christ said this,
Amazing! This verse spoke volumes to me! God knew what I needed to hear and all along it was from His Word. I was so thankful that this pastor pointed me to a saint who too went under a long term affliction while serving God. Because honestly, when I was diagnosed, fear of not serving in a ministry or helping my family disappointed me. And this verse just helped subside this fear! Thank you Jesus!
I've even talked to many people in my church who have auto-immune diseases. And it has helped a lot! But I still felt this empty space in me and needed answers. Should I continue to find out what I can do to cure my disease? Should I stay in the online support groups that deal with AS even though it is overwhelmingly depressing to read? Should I cut out all the foods in my diet to eliminate inflammation? Should I try the medication of injection that my doctor recommends?
My conclusion was this: I need to pray!
Philippians 4:4-7 says,
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Soon after thanking the Lord for my disease and lifting up my burden to the Lord I decided to call a brother in Christ who is also a pastor of a church. He too has an Auto-immune disease and I remember his dear wife (my old discipler) sharing with me how God had him at a trial that was close to death because of his disease. I knew I could call them for spiritual advice and knowledge in medications. So after describing what I have and the anxious thoughts I have towards it. He openly shared what he has tried medical wise and what didn't work. Then he commented that God has shown him that he was going to take it as a "thorn in the flesh". According to Paul who was a follower of Christ said this,
2 Corinthians 12:7
7 So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations,[a] a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited.
Amazing! This verse spoke volumes to me! God knew what I needed to hear and all along it was from His Word. I was so thankful that this pastor pointed me to a saint who too went under a long term affliction while serving God. Because honestly, when I was diagnosed, fear of not serving in a ministry or helping my family disappointed me. And this verse just helped subside this fear! Thank you Jesus!
The Simple Things...
So my summer break (no homeschool) Mondays start off like this: I get my toddler ready and make sure he eats breakfast. My older girls pretty much know how to get ready, feed themselves and pack their swim stuff. Praise God! I forget to eat breakfast so I grab whatever emergency food I have in the car (a granola mix) and pick up some Starbucks on the road (which is one of my favorite personal things to do). I drive them to Vacaville which is about 20 minutes away and they stay for lessons while I try to keep my toddler entertained. Then my son decides to throw a tantrum so I'm dealing with him and needing to change his poopy diaper.
I rush home trying to be on time for my eldest daughter's piano lesson which thankfully, is at our home. Then I slowly carry my sleeping baby into his bed where he'll finish his naptime. I quickly cook lunch and deep clean my kitchen while I have the free time. And do some laundry while I wait for the kids to finish eating.
I then needed to clean my house for bible study the next day so I made my special homemade natural cleaners and started making my way around the house. I was picking up trash, dusting, and wiping crayon stains from the walls because of my little one. I made some calls to see if the post office was holding my mail because of another vandalized mailbox (happens too often) and calls to order a cake my mother in law requested for a party. I pass my gigantic calendar in my room and read my husband's simple requests of making a budget for this month. So, I get on my laptop and enter all the usernames and passwords to every bill I have possible. Writing this all down I get interrupted by my son who wanted to have a book read to him. Of course I was excited and did so. Then my eldest wanted to bake a dessert for the night but before I started I wanted to plan what was for dinner first. Based on the time I needed something fast if I was going to bake (not my best talent) so I decided to cook a kind of breakfast meal! My daughter and I baked a gluten free chocolate chip cookie batch. It was fun and delightful! My husband arrived from work and was happy to see us. He played with the kids for awhile. Afterwards, the kids surprised us with an organized parade. We were filled with smiles and giggles. They love doing these things as a group. Last time they got creative with a made up piano recital.
I may have overdone myself and took on too many tasks today. But just being with my kids and enjoying their "likes" is the best part in my day. Loving them and supporting them means a lot to them and I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for the strength God has given me today! Now...I'm taking my turmeric pill and reclining on a couch full of aches and pains but all worth it! :)
I rush home trying to be on time for my eldest daughter's piano lesson which thankfully, is at our home. Then I slowly carry my sleeping baby into his bed where he'll finish his naptime. I quickly cook lunch and deep clean my kitchen while I have the free time. And do some laundry while I wait for the kids to finish eating.
I then needed to clean my house for bible study the next day so I made my special homemade natural cleaners and started making my way around the house. I was picking up trash, dusting, and wiping crayon stains from the walls because of my little one. I made some calls to see if the post office was holding my mail because of another vandalized mailbox (happens too often) and calls to order a cake my mother in law requested for a party. I pass my gigantic calendar in my room and read my husband's simple requests of making a budget for this month. So, I get on my laptop and enter all the usernames and passwords to every bill I have possible. Writing this all down I get interrupted by my son who wanted to have a book read to him. Of course I was excited and did so. Then my eldest wanted to bake a dessert for the night but before I started I wanted to plan what was for dinner first. Based on the time I needed something fast if I was going to bake (not my best talent) so I decided to cook a kind of breakfast meal! My daughter and I baked a gluten free chocolate chip cookie batch. It was fun and delightful! My husband arrived from work and was happy to see us. He played with the kids for awhile. Afterwards, the kids surprised us with an organized parade. We were filled with smiles and giggles. They love doing these things as a group. Last time they got creative with a made up piano recital.
I may have overdone myself and took on too many tasks today. But just being with my kids and enjoying their "likes" is the best part in my day. Loving them and supporting them means a lot to them and I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for the strength God has given me today! Now...I'm taking my turmeric pill and reclining on a couch full of aches and pains but all worth it! :)
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