I found out that my doctor is always booked cause of how popular of a doctor she is. At first I was discouraged because I felt that I had a lot of unanswered questions from our last appointment which was almost 6 months ago. But only God knows the time she's needed.
Before I saw her, I thought I better make much of my time with her cause who knows how long it will take to see her again. So I wrote a bunch of questions that I would miss to ask her about. She shared with me that my disease was mild at this stage. But telling only by the symptoms and two xrays which was my sacroiliac joint and fingers. She failed to remember another xray which was important to get done and it was my neck. So I was thankful that she was open to writing me up form for the radiologist to have it checked. And of course she recommended that I'd take a less stronger drug called Sulfasalazine. I quickly explained that I'm not quite comfortable to take that step yet. Especially if I didn't know I was allergic to it. She finally respected my wish. She went ahead and examined my mobility and wasn't proud of the results. My measurement of expansion of the lungs chest were not normal and neither was bending over. She recommended that I'd do Yoga or Pilates everyday. Basically, stretch all the time and keep moving.
The day after I realized that I better have my chest x ray done too since I've had problems with stiffness and breathing deeply. I thank God for another opportunity to get that checked and a sitter who patiently watched my kids so I could do this. Now...just waiting for the results next week! I'm hoping and praying in the Lord's name nothing comes out bad.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Saturday, August 10, 2013
New symptom
Well, it's no fun finding new related symptoms in my disease AS. Two weeks ago, I noticed my ribs were so painful. It felt sore and I was limited to bending cause my ribs were inflamed. I did some research online and asked my AS support group on Facebook. And my conclusion was all linked to Costochondritis. It is an inflammation of the ribs. And boy does it hurt! I was upset to not be able to go to church again because of an AS related issue. But God was merciful and allowed me to get rest and read His word during that time. I've read that sometimes the pain can take up to a month to go away. But thankfully, it went away in two days. Even though it seemed like forever...God was in control.
Off to the ER I went...
So I had a little scare three weeks ago. One night I had such an excruciating pain in my lower right abdomen. I was literally on the floor and couldn't move cause of the pain. I was sweating and almost vomited. Thank God my husband was home to help me. I couldn't sleep cause it felt like labor pain! So I asked my husband to grab a washcloth and soak it in warm water. And it helped to some point so that I could sleep.
But the next morning, I knew I had to go to the urgent care just in case it was appendicitis. My husband had to take off work and brought me to Concord. Then the doctor said he wanted me to go to the ER next door cause it could be serious.
So I waited in the ER and did a series of tests...the ultrasound didn't show if it was appendicitis or not. So they had to do a CT scan which required me to do a contrast of iodine in my IV. And that's when they diagnosed me with an ovarian cyst rupture! I was like what? Really?
Well first, praise God it wasn't appendicitis or anything else serious. The only person that came to mind was my sister who had the same problem and symptoms in the beginning of the year. Who would have thought it would happen to me? I was totally shocked. But soon found out that it was actually a common thing that women inherited. I felt some what relieved. But still had one cyst left in there so I'm actually gonna follow up with my doc next week with an ultrasound.
But the next morning, I knew I had to go to the urgent care just in case it was appendicitis. My husband had to take off work and brought me to Concord. Then the doctor said he wanted me to go to the ER next door cause it could be serious.
So I waited in the ER and did a series of tests...the ultrasound didn't show if it was appendicitis or not. So they had to do a CT scan which required me to do a contrast of iodine in my IV. And that's when they diagnosed me with an ovarian cyst rupture! I was like what? Really?
Well first, praise God it wasn't appendicitis or anything else serious. The only person that came to mind was my sister who had the same problem and symptoms in the beginning of the year. Who would have thought it would happen to me? I was totally shocked. But soon found out that it was actually a common thing that women inherited. I felt some what relieved. But still had one cyst left in there so I'm actually gonna follow up with my doc next week with an ultrasound.
God led me to a good doctor who helped alleviate my pain
Wow is all I must say! It started just by talking to a sister from my church who has the same disease as I. And she recommended that I'd see her Osteopathic doctor who specializes in manipulative medicine.
I have to say at first, I was skeptical of what she would do. It seemed like she was just like a Chiropractor who adjusts the joints and spine. But she knows so much more! At my one hour initial appointment I discussed with her my health concerns and disease. And for her to be to understanding and caring was such a blessing already! She said their office talks all about auto-immune disease and in fact she has one herself. So she knows a lot about the discomforts and problems that arise in a typical day for me.
She then continued on cracking all my joints but yet did some kind of work on my vertebrae. I've never seen this practice before and was pretty hopeful when she knew where I was stiff. So she mentioned to her husband (who is also a doctor there) and practitioner in training on how bad my body was. They all worked on me at the same time by pulling and tugging on my pain! There was a weird feeling on my right arm that would allow me to stretch without pain...and no kidding, her husband twisted the muscle and fixed it. It went away! And didn't come back! I cannot even believe how they all alleviated my pain that very day. I literally stood up after her work was done and asked if I could hug her! I told her that I haven't felt so relieved in almost a year. I tried everything from changing my diet and taking (NSAIDs) medication but nothing helped. So from now on, she's got me booked for every two weeks. I thank my Lord for allowing me to have time to make these appointments and finding good sitters for my kids while take a jump of taking care of myself during this summer.
I have to say at first, I was skeptical of what she would do. It seemed like she was just like a Chiropractor who adjusts the joints and spine. But she knows so much more! At my one hour initial appointment I discussed with her my health concerns and disease. And for her to be to understanding and caring was such a blessing already! She said their office talks all about auto-immune disease and in fact she has one herself. So she knows a lot about the discomforts and problems that arise in a typical day for me.
She then continued on cracking all my joints but yet did some kind of work on my vertebrae. I've never seen this practice before and was pretty hopeful when she knew where I was stiff. So she mentioned to her husband (who is also a doctor there) and practitioner in training on how bad my body was. They all worked on me at the same time by pulling and tugging on my pain! There was a weird feeling on my right arm that would allow me to stretch without pain...and no kidding, her husband twisted the muscle and fixed it. It went away! And didn't come back! I cannot even believe how they all alleviated my pain that very day. I literally stood up after her work was done and asked if I could hug her! I told her that I haven't felt so relieved in almost a year. I tried everything from changing my diet and taking (NSAIDs) medication but nothing helped. So from now on, she's got me booked for every two weeks. I thank my Lord for allowing me to have time to make these appointments and finding good sitters for my kids while take a jump of taking care of myself during this summer.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
God did not refuse my friend's prayers
God sees, hears and knows everything including prayers! Nothing escapes His attention.
PSALM 116:1-2
" I LOVE THE LORD, FOR HE HAS HEARD MY VOICE AND MY PLEA FOR MERCY. BECAUSE HE INCLINED HIS EAR TO ME, THEREFORE I WILL CALL ON HIM AS LONG AS I LIVE."
As I ponder what God has done for me so far. It's only fitting that this verse is my pledge. God has been so good to me. When I think about all the pains I've been through (mentally) and how He delivered me through those, I need to be reminded that He was faithful to me from the beginning. And the pain of childbirth...wow was He there helping me every step of the way! I remember my fourth child's birth like it was yesterday. I had the ability to have a safe homebirth in the water for the first time. And all the anxiousness I had towards it was lifted by much prayer from me, my husband and friends. The Lord truly delivered!
Just recently, last week, a flare up in my disease arose. It was Father's Day and everything was going smoothly. I helped my husband prepare a BBQ meal and cleaned up for him. But suddenly after an afternoon nap I felt like my body was aching all over. It felt like the flu but worse! I usually can withstand the flu but this was just so painful. I've already taken a medication in the morning that supposedly lasts for 12 hours so I didn't want to double dose and take another. There wasn't anything I can do but cry it out. And I typically don't cry over pain. Even when I went through childbirth. So this was unusual to me.
We were getting ready to leave for evening service. Something I didn't want to miss especially since our friend was to be announced as an Associate Pastor. My husband suggested that I should stay home and rest. But I insisted on wanting to be there. So we sat in the back room so that I could sit comfortably. My husband tried to massage my back but I kept feeling pain all over. You could tell by the way I looked that I was in pain. I couldn't even smile or look at anyone. Then 30 minutes into the service I gave up and told my husband that I needed to go in the car and moan a little trying to fight the pain. As I laid there trying to rest my mind was not clear to pray. I couldn't even think of praying cause I was distracted.
After service my husband took me home and allowed me to rest in my bed. I was feeling cold like I had the chills and quickly put on a sweater and blanket. I slept in a cradling position hating that I felt that way. I was vulnerable and weak. As soon as I woke up I felt a little better. I soon got a text from my friend Bonnie who goes to our church and she said she prayed for me cause my husband told her at church that I wasn't feeling well. And I believe God used that very prayer to help me. The next day I was on my way to recovery and I got a FB message from Amy Gordon who just knew I was struggling that day. She said she prayed for me and that too gave me more faith that the Lord was near. I decided to take on the task of washing my car and did chores around the house. I texted my husband that I had so much strength it's crazy! And he texted back "I prayed for you this morning." I'll never forget how God has used the simplest tools like prayer and confirmation through friends and family that God still loves me.
The next day, there was a sister from another church in Natomas that called me out of the blue and wanted to ask me for advice because of the similar affliction she's going through. And all I can remind her of was that God wants us to cling to Him and pray for dependence on His strength to get through this trial. All the glory will go to Him and He is honored in a great way. I pray that God would use this affliction for His glory and my sanctification. And that he would teach me how to pray during the times I'm in pain.
PSALM 116:1-2
" I LOVE THE LORD, FOR HE HAS HEARD MY VOICE AND MY PLEA FOR MERCY. BECAUSE HE INCLINED HIS EAR TO ME, THEREFORE I WILL CALL ON HIM AS LONG AS I LIVE."
As I ponder what God has done for me so far. It's only fitting that this verse is my pledge. God has been so good to me. When I think about all the pains I've been through (mentally) and how He delivered me through those, I need to be reminded that He was faithful to me from the beginning. And the pain of childbirth...wow was He there helping me every step of the way! I remember my fourth child's birth like it was yesterday. I had the ability to have a safe homebirth in the water for the first time. And all the anxiousness I had towards it was lifted by much prayer from me, my husband and friends. The Lord truly delivered!
Just recently, last week, a flare up in my disease arose. It was Father's Day and everything was going smoothly. I helped my husband prepare a BBQ meal and cleaned up for him. But suddenly after an afternoon nap I felt like my body was aching all over. It felt like the flu but worse! I usually can withstand the flu but this was just so painful. I've already taken a medication in the morning that supposedly lasts for 12 hours so I didn't want to double dose and take another. There wasn't anything I can do but cry it out. And I typically don't cry over pain. Even when I went through childbirth. So this was unusual to me.
We were getting ready to leave for evening service. Something I didn't want to miss especially since our friend was to be announced as an Associate Pastor. My husband suggested that I should stay home and rest. But I insisted on wanting to be there. So we sat in the back room so that I could sit comfortably. My husband tried to massage my back but I kept feeling pain all over. You could tell by the way I looked that I was in pain. I couldn't even smile or look at anyone. Then 30 minutes into the service I gave up and told my husband that I needed to go in the car and moan a little trying to fight the pain. As I laid there trying to rest my mind was not clear to pray. I couldn't even think of praying cause I was distracted.
After service my husband took me home and allowed me to rest in my bed. I was feeling cold like I had the chills and quickly put on a sweater and blanket. I slept in a cradling position hating that I felt that way. I was vulnerable and weak. As soon as I woke up I felt a little better. I soon got a text from my friend Bonnie who goes to our church and she said she prayed for me cause my husband told her at church that I wasn't feeling well. And I believe God used that very prayer to help me. The next day I was on my way to recovery and I got a FB message from Amy Gordon who just knew I was struggling that day. She said she prayed for me and that too gave me more faith that the Lord was near. I decided to take on the task of washing my car and did chores around the house. I texted my husband that I had so much strength it's crazy! And he texted back "I prayed for you this morning." I'll never forget how God has used the simplest tools like prayer and confirmation through friends and family that God still loves me.
The next day, there was a sister from another church in Natomas that called me out of the blue and wanted to ask me for advice because of the similar affliction she's going through. And all I can remind her of was that God wants us to cling to Him and pray for dependence on His strength to get through this trial. All the glory will go to Him and He is honored in a great way. I pray that God would use this affliction for His glory and my sanctification. And that he would teach me how to pray during the times I'm in pain.
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Live in the future!
I've discovered another way besides reading Scripture to help ease my mind off the pain. I purchased an easy playing chord book of gospel songs. I worshipped my God through this and found it very comforting to sing the words great truth. The song that ministered to my heart today was called Because He Lives. And the lyrics go like this:
(Verse 1)
God sent his son
They called him Jesus
He came to love
Heal and forgive
He lived and died
To buy my pardon
An empty grave
Is there to prove
My Savior lives
(Chorus)
Because he lives
I can face tomorrow
Because he lives
All fear is gone
Because I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because he lives
(Verse 2)
How sweet to hold
A newborn baby
And feel the pride
And joy he gives
But greater still
The calm assurance
This child can face
Uncertain days
Because he lives
(Chorus)
(Verse 3)
And then one day
I'll cross the river
I'll fight life's final war with pain
And then as death
Gives way to victory
I'll see the lights
Of glory and
I'll know he lives
This inspired my husband to play it on his guitar for our bible study tonight and made it sweeter!
My husband taught out of 1 John 5:13-15 and shared with us how we can have certainty through Christ that we have eternal life if we believe. No false teacher/preacher or doubts of God should sway us to think otherwise. The world is full of uncertain things...that is why we have insurances, warranties etc. But God's Word is certain and His promises are forever. What a great reminder to know that He promised me eternal life when I first believed. And that right now I am LIVING ETERNALLY. It has already been given to me. When I die, God's glory will be shown in FULL. What am I doing to do with that encouragement in mind?
GLORIFY GOD in all CIRCUMSTANCES. I want to spend my life ALL OUT for the King! And that means, dying to myself, serving whole heartedly, loving one another, grabbing every opportunity to share God's goodness, give grace, and deepen my relationship with my Heavenly Father.
(Verse 1)
God sent his son
They called him Jesus
He came to love
Heal and forgive
He lived and died
To buy my pardon
An empty grave
Is there to prove
My Savior lives
(Chorus)
Because he lives
I can face tomorrow
Because he lives
All fear is gone
Because I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because he lives
(Verse 2)
How sweet to hold
A newborn baby
And feel the pride
And joy he gives
But greater still
The calm assurance
This child can face
Uncertain days
Because he lives
(Chorus)
(Verse 3)
And then one day
I'll cross the river
I'll fight life's final war with pain
And then as death
Gives way to victory
I'll see the lights
Of glory and
I'll know he lives
This inspired my husband to play it on his guitar for our bible study tonight and made it sweeter!
My husband taught out of 1 John 5:13-15 and shared with us how we can have certainty through Christ that we have eternal life if we believe. No false teacher/preacher or doubts of God should sway us to think otherwise. The world is full of uncertain things...that is why we have insurances, warranties etc. But God's Word is certain and His promises are forever. What a great reminder to know that He promised me eternal life when I first believed. And that right now I am LIVING ETERNALLY. It has already been given to me. When I die, God's glory will be shown in FULL. What am I doing to do with that encouragement in mind?
GLORIFY GOD in all CIRCUMSTANCES. I want to spend my life ALL OUT for the King! And that means, dying to myself, serving whole heartedly, loving one another, grabbing every opportunity to share God's goodness, give grace, and deepen my relationship with my Heavenly Father.
Monday, June 3, 2013
Feels like God is just breaking me to reveal my need of Him more and more
My thought process through this year was just trying finding the solution to my problem! I've had endless nights of just researching online each symptoms that have been recurring. From diets, to safe exercise, to natural medicines, natural dentists, homeopathic doctors, even support groups.
I've even talked to many people in my church who have auto-immune diseases. And it has helped a lot! But I still felt this empty space in me and needed answers. Should I continue to find out what I can do to cure my disease? Should I stay in the online support groups that deal with AS even though it is overwhelmingly depressing to read? Should I cut out all the foods in my diet to eliminate inflammation? Should I try the medication of injection that my doctor recommends?
My conclusion was this: I need to pray!
Philippians 4:4-7 says,
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Soon after thanking the Lord for my disease and lifting up my burden to the Lord I decided to call a brother in Christ who is also a pastor of a church. He too has an Auto-immune disease and I remember his dear wife (my old discipler) sharing with me how God had him at a trial that was close to death because of his disease. I knew I could call them for spiritual advice and knowledge in medications. So after describing what I have and the anxious thoughts I have towards it. He openly shared what he has tried medical wise and what didn't work. Then he commented that God has shown him that he was going to take it as a "thorn in the flesh". According to Paul who was a follower of Christ said this,
Amazing! This verse spoke volumes to me! God knew what I needed to hear and all along it was from His Word. I was so thankful that this pastor pointed me to a saint who too went under a long term affliction while serving God. Because honestly, when I was diagnosed, fear of not serving in a ministry or helping my family disappointed me. And this verse just helped subside this fear! Thank you Jesus!
I've even talked to many people in my church who have auto-immune diseases. And it has helped a lot! But I still felt this empty space in me and needed answers. Should I continue to find out what I can do to cure my disease? Should I stay in the online support groups that deal with AS even though it is overwhelmingly depressing to read? Should I cut out all the foods in my diet to eliminate inflammation? Should I try the medication of injection that my doctor recommends?
My conclusion was this: I need to pray!
Philippians 4:4-7 says,
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Soon after thanking the Lord for my disease and lifting up my burden to the Lord I decided to call a brother in Christ who is also a pastor of a church. He too has an Auto-immune disease and I remember his dear wife (my old discipler) sharing with me how God had him at a trial that was close to death because of his disease. I knew I could call them for spiritual advice and knowledge in medications. So after describing what I have and the anxious thoughts I have towards it. He openly shared what he has tried medical wise and what didn't work. Then he commented that God has shown him that he was going to take it as a "thorn in the flesh". According to Paul who was a follower of Christ said this,
2 Corinthians 12:7
7 So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations,[a] a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited.
Amazing! This verse spoke volumes to me! God knew what I needed to hear and all along it was from His Word. I was so thankful that this pastor pointed me to a saint who too went under a long term affliction while serving God. Because honestly, when I was diagnosed, fear of not serving in a ministry or helping my family disappointed me. And this verse just helped subside this fear! Thank you Jesus!
The Simple Things...
So my summer break (no homeschool) Mondays start off like this: I get my toddler ready and make sure he eats breakfast. My older girls pretty much know how to get ready, feed themselves and pack their swim stuff. Praise God! I forget to eat breakfast so I grab whatever emergency food I have in the car (a granola mix) and pick up some Starbucks on the road (which is one of my favorite personal things to do). I drive them to Vacaville which is about 20 minutes away and they stay for lessons while I try to keep my toddler entertained. Then my son decides to throw a tantrum so I'm dealing with him and needing to change his poopy diaper.
I rush home trying to be on time for my eldest daughter's piano lesson which thankfully, is at our home. Then I slowly carry my sleeping baby into his bed where he'll finish his naptime. I quickly cook lunch and deep clean my kitchen while I have the free time. And do some laundry while I wait for the kids to finish eating.
I then needed to clean my house for bible study the next day so I made my special homemade natural cleaners and started making my way around the house. I was picking up trash, dusting, and wiping crayon stains from the walls because of my little one. I made some calls to see if the post office was holding my mail because of another vandalized mailbox (happens too often) and calls to order a cake my mother in law requested for a party. I pass my gigantic calendar in my room and read my husband's simple requests of making a budget for this month. So, I get on my laptop and enter all the usernames and passwords to every bill I have possible. Writing this all down I get interrupted by my son who wanted to have a book read to him. Of course I was excited and did so. Then my eldest wanted to bake a dessert for the night but before I started I wanted to plan what was for dinner first. Based on the time I needed something fast if I was going to bake (not my best talent) so I decided to cook a kind of breakfast meal! My daughter and I baked a gluten free chocolate chip cookie batch. It was fun and delightful! My husband arrived from work and was happy to see us. He played with the kids for awhile. Afterwards, the kids surprised us with an organized parade. We were filled with smiles and giggles. They love doing these things as a group. Last time they got creative with a made up piano recital.
I may have overdone myself and took on too many tasks today. But just being with my kids and enjoying their "likes" is the best part in my day. Loving them and supporting them means a lot to them and I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for the strength God has given me today! Now...I'm taking my turmeric pill and reclining on a couch full of aches and pains but all worth it! :)
I rush home trying to be on time for my eldest daughter's piano lesson which thankfully, is at our home. Then I slowly carry my sleeping baby into his bed where he'll finish his naptime. I quickly cook lunch and deep clean my kitchen while I have the free time. And do some laundry while I wait for the kids to finish eating.
I then needed to clean my house for bible study the next day so I made my special homemade natural cleaners and started making my way around the house. I was picking up trash, dusting, and wiping crayon stains from the walls because of my little one. I made some calls to see if the post office was holding my mail because of another vandalized mailbox (happens too often) and calls to order a cake my mother in law requested for a party. I pass my gigantic calendar in my room and read my husband's simple requests of making a budget for this month. So, I get on my laptop and enter all the usernames and passwords to every bill I have possible. Writing this all down I get interrupted by my son who wanted to have a book read to him. Of course I was excited and did so. Then my eldest wanted to bake a dessert for the night but before I started I wanted to plan what was for dinner first. Based on the time I needed something fast if I was going to bake (not my best talent) so I decided to cook a kind of breakfast meal! My daughter and I baked a gluten free chocolate chip cookie batch. It was fun and delightful! My husband arrived from work and was happy to see us. He played with the kids for awhile. Afterwards, the kids surprised us with an organized parade. We were filled with smiles and giggles. They love doing these things as a group. Last time they got creative with a made up piano recital.
I may have overdone myself and took on too many tasks today. But just being with my kids and enjoying their "likes" is the best part in my day. Loving them and supporting them means a lot to them and I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for the strength God has given me today! Now...I'm taking my turmeric pill and reclining on a couch full of aches and pains but all worth it! :)
Saturday, June 1, 2013
A New Perspective on Health...
Dealing with the everyday "abnormality" under the skin and the plans of medication or being non-medicated has allowed me to have a better understanding of those who have and deal with a disease. Wow, and this is just all the surface stuff I think about all the time. There's the burden of doctor appointments, medical bills, time consuming tests and research. Then there's research of a healthy diet that prevents certain "flare up" symptoms. The thing I find more of an annoyance is that unknowingly you may find yourself not being able to do anything one day. You feel like a cloud is covering you and you're overwhelmed with fatigue and weakness. Your immunity feels low and you're just feeling nauseated and lose an appetite to eat.
If you've known me before my symptoms became more prominent you'll know that I'm not no ordinary woman. I actually like moving furniture and lifting heavy things. I like sports and playing them. I always felt physically able to do everything and anything! I'm also a multi tasked person (which is probably not the wisest thing to do). If there was one to be on the phone, carry all the grocery bags up a flight of stairs and cook on the stove at the same time...that would be me.
So when my doctor told me to "take it easy" it was sad news for me. Slowing down was just never on my agenda. And to know that I may experience immobility with this disease in a few years or more struck me!
God surely has his plan for me. That brings to mind my favorite verse when I first had doubts about this diagnosis from my family practitioner. And wanted to be normal again.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18, " So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."
If you've known me before my symptoms became more prominent you'll know that I'm not no ordinary woman. I actually like moving furniture and lifting heavy things. I like sports and playing them. I always felt physically able to do everything and anything! I'm also a multi tasked person (which is probably not the wisest thing to do). If there was one to be on the phone, carry all the grocery bags up a flight of stairs and cook on the stove at the same time...that would be me.
So when my doctor told me to "take it easy" it was sad news for me. Slowing down was just never on my agenda. And to know that I may experience immobility with this disease in a few years or more struck me!
God surely has his plan for me. That brings to mind my favorite verse when I first had doubts about this diagnosis from my family practitioner. And wanted to be normal again.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18, " So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."
Thursday, May 30, 2013
The diagnosis
So there I was sitting waiting for my Rheumatologist to view my x-rays...I was 29 and turning 30 the next day. My doc confirmed that I have Ankylosing Spondylitis. She's been taking note of my symptoms and also witnessed inflammation in the joints of my fingers. Then there was a distinct corrosion of my sacroiliac joint (which explained my lower back pain).
Instantly, I had a sigh of RELIEF because I've been waiting over a year to find out what was wrong with me. But at the same time I had a huge FEAR that my symptoms would get worse and I wouldn't be able to give myself to my kids and husband physically. Thoughts of depression overwhelmed me as I cried in my car before I left the doctor's. I prayed and asked God to help me accept this affliction. But it was hard.
This is a overview of what my auto-immune disease is:
Ankylosing spondylitis (pronounced ank-kih-low-sing spon-dill-eye-tiss), or AS, is a form of arthritis that primarily affects the spine, although other joints can become involved. It causes inflammation of the spinal joints (vertebrae) that can lead to severe, chronic pain and discomfort. In the most advanced cases (but not in all cases), this inflammation can lead to new bone formation on the spine, causing the spine to fuse in a fixed, immobile position, sometimes creating a forward-stooped posture. This forward curvature of the spine is called kyphosis.
AS can also cause inflammation, pain and stiffness in other areas of the body such as the shoulders, hips, ribs, heels and small joints of the hands and feet. Sometimes the eyes can become involved (known as Iritis or Uveitis), and rarely, the lungs and heart can be affected. The hallmark feature of ankylosing spondylitis is the involvement of the sacroiliac (SI) joints during the progression of the disease, which are the joints at the base of the spine, where the spine joins the pelvis.
SYMPTOMS:
It is important to note that the course of ankylosing spondylitis varies greatly from person to person. So too can the onset of symptoms. Although symptoms usually start to appear in late adolescence or early adulthood (ages 17-35), the symptoms can occur in children or much later.
Typically, the first symptoms of AS are frequent pain and stiffness in the lower back and buttocks, which comes on gradually over the course of a few weeks or months. At first, discomfort may only be felt on one side, or alternate sides. The pain is usually dull and diffuse, rather than localized. This pain and stiffness is usually worse in the mornings and during the night, but may be improved by a warm shower or light exercise. Also, in the early stages of AS, there may be mild fever, loss of appetite and general discomfort. It is important to note that back pain from ankylosing spondylitis is inflammatory in nature and not mechanical. The pain normally becomes persistent (chronic) and is felt on both sides, usually persisting for at least three months. Over the course of months or years, the stiffness and pain can spread up the spine and into the neck. Pain and tenderness spreading to the ribs, shoulder blades, hips, thighs and heels is possible as well. Note that AS can present differently at onset in women than in men. Quoting Dr. Elaine Adams, "Women often present in a little more atypical fashion so it's even harder to make the diagnoses in women." For example, anecdotally we have heard from women with AS who have stated that their symptoms started in the neck rather than in the lower back. Varying levels of fatigue may also result from the inflammation caused by AS. The body must expend energy to deal with the inflammation, thus causing fatigue. Also, mild to moderate anemia, which may also result from the inflammation, can contribute to an overall feeling of tiredness.
Other Symptoms
In a minority of individuals, the pain does not start in the lower back, but in a peripheral joint such as the hip, ankle, elbow, knee, heel or shoulder. This pain is commonly caused by enthesitis, which is the inflammation of the site where a ligament or tendon attaches to bone. Inflammation and pain in peripheral joints is more common in juveniles with AS. This can be confusing since, without the immediate presence of back pain, AS may look like some other form of arthritis. Many people with AS also experience bowel inflammation, which may be associated with Crohn's Disease or ulcerative colitis. AS is often accompanied by iritis or uveitis (inflammation of the eyes). About one third of people with AS will experience inflammation of the eye at least once. Signs of iritis or uevitis are: Eye(s) becoming painful, watery, red and individuals may experience blurred vision and sensitivity to bright light.
...so this is my chronic incurable disease.
*I've highlighted what I have so far.
Instantly, I had a sigh of RELIEF because I've been waiting over a year to find out what was wrong with me. But at the same time I had a huge FEAR that my symptoms would get worse and I wouldn't be able to give myself to my kids and husband physically. Thoughts of depression overwhelmed me as I cried in my car before I left the doctor's. I prayed and asked God to help me accept this affliction. But it was hard.
This is a overview of what my auto-immune disease is:
Ankylosing spondylitis (pronounced ank-kih-low-sing spon-dill-eye-tiss), or AS, is a form of arthritis that primarily affects the spine, although other joints can become involved. It causes inflammation of the spinal joints (vertebrae) that can lead to severe, chronic pain and discomfort. In the most advanced cases (but not in all cases), this inflammation can lead to new bone formation on the spine, causing the spine to fuse in a fixed, immobile position, sometimes creating a forward-stooped posture. This forward curvature of the spine is called kyphosis.
AS can also cause inflammation, pain and stiffness in other areas of the body such as the shoulders, hips, ribs, heels and small joints of the hands and feet. Sometimes the eyes can become involved (known as Iritis or Uveitis), and rarely, the lungs and heart can be affected. The hallmark feature of ankylosing spondylitis is the involvement of the sacroiliac (SI) joints during the progression of the disease, which are the joints at the base of the spine, where the spine joins the pelvis.
SYMPTOMS:
It is important to note that the course of ankylosing spondylitis varies greatly from person to person. So too can the onset of symptoms. Although symptoms usually start to appear in late adolescence or early adulthood (ages 17-35), the symptoms can occur in children or much later.
Typically, the first symptoms of AS are frequent pain and stiffness in the lower back and buttocks, which comes on gradually over the course of a few weeks or months. At first, discomfort may only be felt on one side, or alternate sides. The pain is usually dull and diffuse, rather than localized. This pain and stiffness is usually worse in the mornings and during the night, but may be improved by a warm shower or light exercise. Also, in the early stages of AS, there may be mild fever, loss of appetite and general discomfort. It is important to note that back pain from ankylosing spondylitis is inflammatory in nature and not mechanical. The pain normally becomes persistent (chronic) and is felt on both sides, usually persisting for at least three months. Over the course of months or years, the stiffness and pain can spread up the spine and into the neck. Pain and tenderness spreading to the ribs, shoulder blades, hips, thighs and heels is possible as well. Note that AS can present differently at onset in women than in men. Quoting Dr. Elaine Adams, "Women often present in a little more atypical fashion so it's even harder to make the diagnoses in women." For example, anecdotally we have heard from women with AS who have stated that their symptoms started in the neck rather than in the lower back. Varying levels of fatigue may also result from the inflammation caused by AS. The body must expend energy to deal with the inflammation, thus causing fatigue. Also, mild to moderate anemia, which may also result from the inflammation, can contribute to an overall feeling of tiredness.
In a minority of individuals, the pain does not start in the lower back, but in a peripheral joint such as the hip, ankle, elbow, knee, heel or shoulder. This pain is commonly caused by enthesitis, which is the inflammation of the site where a ligament or tendon attaches to bone. Inflammation and pain in peripheral joints is more common in juveniles with AS. This can be confusing since, without the immediate presence of back pain, AS may look like some other form of arthritis. Many people with AS also experience bowel inflammation, which may be associated with Crohn's Disease or ulcerative colitis. AS is often accompanied by iritis or uveitis (inflammation of the eyes). About one third of people with AS will experience inflammation of the eye at least once. Signs of iritis or uevitis are: Eye(s) becoming painful, watery, red and individuals may experience blurred vision and sensitivity to bright light.
...so this is my chronic incurable disease.
*I've highlighted what I have so far.
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